Russell Frank
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Bivens in the Big Leagues: It Just Gets Better
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Wait a second, you may be thinking. Didn’t you write about Spencer Bivens in your last column? I did, but the story of the State College kid who arrived in […]
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‘It’s About Not Giving Up.’ State College Area’s Spencer Bivens Gets Call to the Bigs
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Spencer Bivens has played baseball for the Rogers State Hillcats, the Lions de Savigny de-sur-Orge, the Steel City Slammin’ Sammies, the Washington Wild Things, the Lexington Legends, the West Virginia […]
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Yes Mow June
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Now that we’re all mowing our lawns again, I thought I’d dig up some fun and un-fun facts about the green carpets beneath our feet. Fun Fact No. 1: We […]
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‘It May Have Started as a Battle’: On the Site of the Bear River Massacre
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PRESTON, IDAHO – Just north of Preston, the town where “Napoleon Dynamite” was filmed, past Polar Bear Burgers and Shakes, past the Pop’n Pins bowling alley, past The Hangout, the […]
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Hey, Hey, Ho, Ho, Mindless Chants Have Got to Go
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Protests are messy affairs. They sprawl beyond the intentions of their organizers, attracting reformers and revolutionaries (and counterrevolutionaries); rebels with related and unrelated causes (I remember “Save the Whales” signs […]
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What Is a Spring Day If Not a Poem in Your Pocket?
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As I walked up the mall last Wednesday, a sign caught my eye: “Free Poems.” Adjacent was a folding table on which were displayed a plate of cookies; pens and […]
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The Eclipse: Words Failed Me
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The eclipse chasers who insist the only way to experience a total solar eclipse is in the path of totality are totally right. I think I said those exact words […]
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Isn’t It a Riot, Russell’s on a Diet
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I was a chubby kid. I was a chubby kid but I wasn’t the chubbiest kid. That was my friend Arthur, to whom I owe a debt of gratitude because […]
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The Problem with Vacations: They End
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I always tell students in my column-writing class: You’re only allowed to write about your vacation if everything goes kablooey. My vacation was fabulous. Then, kablooey.
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News from a Parallel Universe: TPU Prez Says No to More Dough
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Citing Teen Pants University’s budget woes, President Elida Benniedup has declined the increase in her compensation package approved by the Board of Trustees at their February meeting. “Of course I’m […]